Wednesday, March 31, 2010

I Can See Clearly Now



I have accomplished a seemingly impossible fetish. Right…feat. It’s something I’ve tried to do for a couple of years...off and on. I’ve put contact lenses on my eyeballs…right on. And right on! Wooo hooo!

I’ve always marveled at those who could easily get contacts in their eyes. I’ve always struggled because of my natural flinch reflex. That would be no surprise to the woman who gave me my last pedicure (my second ever). When she touched my feet, I had to resist the urge to kick her in the face. She thought it was funny that I was ticklish, but if she knew how much my foot wanted to smack her in the chin…she wouldn’t have been laughing.

So whenever I’ve tried to put contact lenses in…I would blink. And because contacts are as thin as Saran Wrap…they’d just fold over like a calzone. (I like using food items as similes.) After enough calzones…I was full and often gave up in desperado.


Any who…….

I have been practicing…by holding my eyes wide open and poking myself in the eye. I figured I needed to toughen up and learn to remain relaxed while a foreign object approached my eye. I guess my barbaric methods of attack worked. To heck with the eye professionals from Lenscrafters.

I actually surprised myself when I managed to get the lenses in…but mostly because now I could see everything around me. Woah…I guess I really don’t resemble Julia Roberts …do I?

My contacted eyes have actually felt pretty comfortable today. Now I’m wondering about tomorrow…and if I’ll be able to put them in again. But I probably should be wondering about tonight. Will I ever be able to get these things out??? And why do I have a hankerin’ for a calzone for dinner?

7 comments:

Brianna said...

MOM!!! THA'S AWESOME!
its a miracle... you can see again! haha i'm prod of you for getting them in! keep it up girlfriend!

Jayne said...

I can't believe you finally did it. I laughed out loud about the pedicure. I've been there LOL

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