When it comes to having skills…
some folks have
mad,
rad,
and Olympiad skills
doing incredible things.
Some have skills
flying planes, painting landscapes, and walking like a ninja
which is quite impressive.
I ,on the other hand, (and foot)
have tad skills…
unless of course you are talking
Parallel Parking.
Then, my friends…
I go to the head of the class and leave you all behind
in the back
with the chuckle head kids who aren't paying attention.
I’ve always prided myself on the ability to parallel park.
I could very well be a
Parallel Parking Virtuoso.
Okay, I had to dig deep to find my mad skill
(need a shovel ova here)
but when it comes to parking a 4 wheel vehicle in a tight ass spot…
I’m your girl.
If parallel parking was a competitive sport at the Olympics…
I believe I would be a major contender.
Move over Michael Phelps…
this Kat could out gold you
and make a splash on the cover of Parallel Parking Divas Magazine.
I learned and honed my parallel parking craft
when I was newly out of college and working at Bridgeport Hospital in CT.
My talent was mainly out of necessity.
Necessity is the mother of
invention,
inspiration,
innovation and
pauperism.
The monthly charge for parking in the lot across from the hospital…
didn't fit my soup and beans budget.
So I had to park on the city streets surrounding the hospital.
So every day around 6 am B. C. (Before Coffee)
I had to squeeze my blue Datsun B210 into the tightest spots imaginable.
I admit…
from time to time I get really cocky
and I like to boast about my skills to PaulA.
I particularly like challenging PaulA to a parallel park off.
(throwdown...this Saturday...you and me ....downtown Nashville.)
Whenever he passes on a parallel parking spot...
I can't help heckling him.
is that bad?
Anywhooooooo…..
The other day,
back from a Target run,
I used my mad skills and
pulled the car into a tiiiight spot between two cars.
In one attempt.
The Parallel Parking Virtuoso strikes again.
All cool until
I had to move from the spot.
Apparently I was a liiittttttle close to the mailbox.
If "closest to the mailbox" was an event...
I would have won. For sure.
There was no way I could get the car out
without scratching it against the mailbox.
What's a Kat to do?
Put my tail between my legs and
ask PaulA to use his skills
to get me out of that jam of a pickle.
Currently I'm done bragging about my
parallel parking virtuosity.
Now I'm on to
showing-off my other mad skill...
mad skill or just mad?
2 finger whistling.
Stay tuned...
it's quite impressive.
