Tread Lightly

I have a habit of moving things around so much that I forget where I put/hide them. When people are coming over (Quick, company’s coming!!!) and I want to get rid of the crap/stuff that is piled high on my kitchen desk...I look for places to hide things. I put things in drawers and closets, but the best hiding place I have in my house is in my dining room…behind the drapes. The drapes are long so they “puddle” on the floor. That’s a funny decorating term…but an accurate description. The puddle effect works great for me, because I can throw papers and junk in baskets and stack them behind the drapes. With the puddle thing going…you would never know. (I realize I just outed myself.) Okay, I’m sure you have some hiding place of your own where you stash your trash.

So between Thanksgiving and New Years….I used and overused my puddles. Now that it’s time to get things back out (The party’s over!!!)...I can’t find the stuff I’ve moved. Where are my bills? How do I tell Mr. Mastercard that I am late because I hid the bill? I really want to pay that ridiculously hideously LARGE bill…but it got lost in my puddle. For some reason, Mr. Mastercard wasn’t buying my puddle excuse.

But worst than misplacing the Mastercard bill (heck, no love lost…there will be another one next month)…I’ve misplaced the key to my treadmill. The little dohickey that turns the treadmill on and makes the tread go…so I can go. Go Kat Go. The last time I saw it was just before Thanksgiving when I moved the key from the treadmill so the little kids visiting us wouldn’t get hurt. (I know I frequently hurt myself when I tread.) Now I can’t find the darn key. So because my tread can’t go…my ass grows.

Funny thing is…now my friends want me to come over and lose their treadmill keys. Then they will have a legit reason…as to why their ass is growing. (jk)

Stay tuned to “As the ass grows…..”