Monday, April 26, 2010

Private Eye Moms

As an empty-nester…I’m always looking for new ways to spend my free time. Granted, I have been busy with my blog. It does require a lot of effort…especially to rise to the ‘Blogger Extraordinaire’ status that I have attained in such a relatively short period of time. But because I’ve already blown the doors off blogging…I’ve been searching for a new gig. It appears that I have found it….Private Eye Mom.

My new career idea came to me when I saw a segment on the Today show about everyday moms who put aside dishwashing, toilet scrubbing, and schlepping…and become private investigators. They are soccer moms…who after they leave the soccer fields…get in their minivans and become super sleuths. They moonlight during the daylight and even the nightlight.

Sounds like a modern day version of Charlie Angels…doesn’t it?

PvtEye Moms deal mostly with infidelity cases... catching people in the “act” … “honey trappings.” (Surprise honey.) Their mission…should the P I Moms decide to take it? Tail the tails of weasels…and show and tell tales of those who they've tailed…and nailed. And also: trailing make sure the teen's tail is on the trail they've told...and not a tall tale.

They say moms are perfect for the job…they blend in, so they can work unnoticed. Hey, who would suspect that a soccer mom’s sports bra would be wired for sound and her hoodie would be concealing a video cam? A P I Mom is kinda like a Gladys Kravitz (from Bewitched if you’re too young to know)…WITHOUT the curtains but WITH the minivan.

Moms in general have a great intuitive voice and special instincts that give them an advantage in the business. For example: Most moms can sense when their kid is going sneak out of the house, or throw a bender…2 weeks before it happens.


The PI business could be a good match for me. I have a nose for nosiness, like to run in slow-motion, and have an affinity for spy gadgets. I would immediately get my hands on a shoe phone.

I admit, however, I would have to change a few things before I could embark on a new career as Private Eye Mom. I’m afraid of packing heat of any kind…guns or hot flashes. (They are both dangerous and result in fiery explosions.) I retired my minivan. And I would have to work on a new hair blend to blend in.

Hmmm…..I wonder if there is a need for Empty-nester Private Eye Moms.

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