Camp Linnyj

I’m having T-shirts made that say: I SURVIVED Camp Linnyj. Last weekend Linnyj and Mickster invited us and the candyKanes (a very sweet couple) to Nantucket. Albeit, the house was not exactly a camp…it was a first-rate gorgeous home. So I’m not talking about the accommodations. I’m talking about surviving Linnyj…that girl can run a Kat ragged.

Camp Linnyj itinerary: First…a two and a half hour ferry ride… through choppy water. How choppy you ask? The two little girls sitting next to us might have been able to tell you, but they were very busy...crying and spewing their lunch through their mouths and noses. Kats aren’t known for swimming, so the girls' commotion added to my fear and uneasiness. And speaking of uneasy…that would be my stomach.

After we were Nantucket side…It only took a few hours before my stomach was esophageal sphincter side up. Next on the itinerary: Happy Hour…a mystery glass of vodka mixed with something red, prepared by Counselor Linnyj. Then a great dinner out…where she force fed me a couple of cosmos...if I remember correctly.

After allowing a little sleep...the next morning it was rise and shine. The main activity of the day…a 20 mile bike ride into the wind. After which, Counselor Linnyj made us shop…til you dropped. Or in my case stumbled…that would be the cobblestone’s fault. Next activity: Happy Hour and dinner. The following day Linnyj had golf planned, but PaulA and I left the island in the morning. We heard she makes you run the golf course with your golf bag tied to your back, and drop for 50 push-ups on each fairway. I hope the candyKanes didn’t suck at that activity.

I always thought I was in shape until I went to Camp Linnyj. Linnyj finished the bike ride first and Yours Truly brought up the rear. PaulA stayed with my behind…to pick me up in case I took a header. Whoever came up with the expression “It’s as easy as riding a bike” has never ridden 20 miles into a strong head wind. There were times I was pedaling 40 mph and going nowhere…the same place that bridge in Alaska is going. I admit, Counselor Linnyj does have a little compassion for her campers…a soft side…when she’s not beating your ass into the ground. She did come back with her SUV to pick me up. But by then the house was just 100 yards away. Thanks anyway, Counselor Linnyj…but I got it from here!

So I SURVIVED Camp Linnyj. I’ll be selling those T-shirts on eBay if you care to buy one. They’re only five bucks a piece…but time with Counselor Linnyj….PRICELESS.