Friday, September 19, 2008

Go To The Head of the Class

Last week I attended Open House…my last ever, as Bri is now a High School Senior. When I think about it ….I’ve attended many open houses…3 x 13 (including kindergarten)= 39 open houses. Oh, I forgot about the other open houses I’ve been to. But those are different …they serve booze at those…only cookies and coffee at the school. Definitely not the same.

So I followed Bri’s class schedule, attended some interesting classes and met some nice teachers. One thing I wondered as I changed classes…Was I ever this smart?

But I did get to show off my stuff…in Mr. Jones’ physics class. After the teacher went through the litany of what the kids would be learning and the grading polices, etc. etc. He asked if the parents had questions. There was silence…no one had questions. My God, it’s physics…who is really interested??

Then one parent in the group asked, “This doesn’t pertain to physics…but could you please tell me…What does that sentence written on the bottom left-hand side of your blackboard mean?” The statement read: MR. JONES IS THE SHIZNAY. Mr. Jones answered, “I don’t know. A former student was just in here and wrote it on the board. Does anyone here know what that means?”

All the parents in the class shook their head…no…never heard of it…but I did. Hey, I wasn’t embarrassed to show-off my expert command of the English language. So I raised my hand…and volunteered, “Mr. Jones, that is actually a very positive comment to you. The student that wrote it thinks you’re great…cool. They like you.”

I am sure that I impressed the teacher with the breadth and depth of my knowledge. “Go to the head of the class, Kat.” Okay, he didn’t say that. I bet he wanted to… but he probably didn’t want me to look like Teacher’s Pet and have everyone give me the evil eye.

I was glad to help him out…he just needed a little vocab. lesson from Kat. He’s a physics teacher so what the heck does he know? Now that I’m over-the-hill and not in school…my education comes from my kids.

Thanks to them I am muy intelligente….a regular walking dictionary and thesaurus. My kids are…da bomb, shiznit, wicked, shizzle, sick, hot, bitchin, the shit, phat, saweeet…and in case you are like Mr. Jones and aren’t down with the lingo…they are THE GREATEST.

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