Wednesday, February 3, 2010

For Posterior-ity


I enjoy movies with separate and distinct storylines. Stories that eventually intersect…or in some cases, collide. Maybe I could write a screenplay about characters whose life paths end up crossing each other. Think Academy Award winning movie… “Crash”……

Cut to:
Kat the blogger…at home in her blog chair.
The camera pans far and wide, capturing Kat’s large ass in her blog chair. She’s at home blogging her simple life away. A tornado spins up out of the plains…think Dorothy in "The Wizard of Oz.”‘ Kat runs for cover in her newly installed bomb shelter in her basement. The tornado picks up her house…swirling it around…carrying the house and contents. Her computer and blog chair is seen flying through the air….as Kat watches her blog life past before her.

Cut to:
20 Years Later in a Peruvian Rainforest.
An archeologist is searching for ancient artifacts deep in the jungle. After weeks of excavation, he discovers a segment of petrified wood…brushes the dirt off…revealing an impression. He’s perplexed by the shape of the impression and the faint symbols, or possible letters, imprinted in the wood. His discovery is not indigenous to the area. He questions how the material ended up in this “neck of the woods.” He contemplates who would know the answer…perhaps, an expert at the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History, or Al Roker? The archeologist brings the wood back to the states to…Washington DC.

Cut to:
Kat’s new residence
Kat’s house was rebuilt after the tornado. She’s still at the business of blogging…different chair…same wide camera angle. Kat decides to take a trip to Washington DC to represent Hack Bloggers of America . As President of the organization, she's there to voice concerns regarding how hack bloggers get NO respect…think Mr. Smith goes to Washington. While in Washington, Kat takes in some historical sights and visits the Museum of Natural History…

Cut :
Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History
A precocious kid from Idaho, on a field trip with his middle school, is walking through the Rainforest Wood exhibit. He is intrigued by a large impression in a piece of wood not indigenous to the rainforest neck of the woods. He tries to decipher the symbols or letters found in the impression of the wood...“I” … “K” ...“E”.

Kat is standing at a nearby exhibit, counting the rings on a cross section of a tree, when she hears the youngster’s loud sounds of astonishment, as he views the petrified wood. Kat pushes through the crowd to take a closer look. Could it be…could it be Kat’s long lost IKEA blog chair from years gone by?

Cut to:
Local museum in Kat’s hometown.
Kat brings home the remains of her old IKEA blog chair. Her posterior…for posterity sake.

Anyone interested in the movie rights? Come on. You know it has “Academy Award Winning”… written all over it.

4 comments:

big C said...

You are a clever lady....!!

Anonymous said...

bahha you're too funny mom! GET STARTED ON A REAL MOVIE MISSY!!!

love,
wishy

Anonymous said...

katstaleof5.blogspot.com; You saved my day again.

Anonymous said...

Nice dispatch and this post helped me alot in my college assignement. Gratefulness you seeking your information.