Friday, August 5, 2011

Yo Ho Ho, PIRATES

Last weekend a band of marauding pirates descended the poop deck of their Jolly Roger and came ashore...plundering and pillaging the likes of our bluff.
They were a motley crew...looking for landlubbers to walk the plank.

Arrgghhhh.

Each year...we have a family get-together/pirate party
when anyone with an eye patch, rubber sword, bandana,
and the nonsense-ability to say “Shiver me timbers, Matey” ...is a pirate.


Needless to say, swashbuckling was had by all.

Reflecting back on the likes of me fella buccaneers, I got meself a wonderin’...
what part of the pirate stereotype is fact and what part is myth?
Or in other words....What is Fact or Crap?...(title rip-off of a fun game.)

So, here we go...Fact or Crap?

Pirates wore an eye patch to look bad ass? Fact or Crap?

Crap. Although the eye patch aded to their bad ass image...it was used to keep one eye adjusted to darkness so that when fighting moved inside the ship, below deck, they could see to fight.

Pirates made their prisoners walk the plank? Fact or Crap?

Crap. Walking the plank was too easy...not torturous enough.
Pirates preferred to hack their prisoners to death with swords.

Pirates wore colorful garb. Fact or Crap?

Fact. But real pirates don’t wear eyeliner...ala our fav fake pirate, Johnny Depp.

Pirates disappeared after the 18th century. Fact or Crap?

Crap. There are still pirates today..but they’ve traded in their treasure maps for the GPS.

Anywhooooo......

I was thinking that women aren't really thought of as pirates (except for Halloween costumes.)
So I cranked up the Google Machine to find the answer to my burning question:

Did women pirates exist?

Apparently there were women pirates in the 1700's (such as Anne Bonney and Mary Read)...
but the women dressed as men to hide their identity.

They actually looked like.....


And NOT like this......



Wait, did I  just hear you guys say, “Oh, Crap.”


Until next year Mateys............
(ye be properly warned)



2 comments:

Chelsea said...

fact or crap: you are awesome?


FACT!!!!!!


love you. love this. love your humor and love our traditions :)

About Last Weekend said...

Love the photo. And you'll never have to wait till I say "Oh crap"...even with high boots on...