Kat's Greatest Hits

I have a confession to make. I was thinking of copying and pasting an old blog I had written months ago and passing it off as a newly written blog. Partly to see if anyone would notice...even care, or then again… even care. I told PaulA about my little caper. And he said, “Why not? If the Rolling Stones can replay the oldies, why can’t you?" Darn good thinking, PaulA…way to put that noggin to work.

So I am launching “Kat’s Greatest Hits”….I would take requests, but that would mean I would have to hear from you out there in blogworld…and it seems like you are either very shy…or non-existent. I realize my blogs were never real “hits”….so you are wondering how could there be “Greatest Hits”…but could you please humor me for a minute and just roll with it, already.

For my first Greatest Hit…I am bringing back:

Starbucks Encounter
Today I was in another town and had some time to kill so I found a Starbucks…which was easy. Isn’t there one on every corner? I had my book, so why not park my butt in a warm trendy coffee shop? Only problem was, I felt like a fraud…like all the alarms were going off the minute I stepped in the door. You see, I’m a Dunkin Donuts regular and I just crossed over to the other side.

I wasn’t sure how to order the different coffee sizes, so I motioned with my fingers to indicate a small decaff. The barista handed me my coffee, “Here you are (Don’t say Maam.)…one tall decaff.” (Darn thing looks short to me.) So I took my small/tall coffee and looked around…nice couches, chairs by the fireplace, tables…(very posh). The only problem was everything was taken…except one table in the corner with a chair that faced the wall. Yep…that would be my table. After all, I am a coffee fraud so I deserve to face the wall.

So I sat down and cranked my neck around. Who’s here? Let’s see…some cappuccino moms with hot chocolate kids in tow. An espresso woman in for a quick jolt. A yuppie caramel frappuccino couple with a mocha syrup baby in a carrier… a skinny latte teenager and a Chi tea babe.

I’m not sure why I feel like a fraud at Starbucks or what they do to make me feel this way.

Maybe because their coffee pourers are called baristas. I overheard a woman order a special coffee that had 8 adjectives, 6 adverbs and a couple of nouns. The barista got it right the first time. Heck, I could never work there…I just don’t have that much memory in my bank. Then the coffee expert made something that sounded like a 747 landing…and no one ducked for cover…except me.

Maybe because they play Starbucks CDs recorded at their own record label which are configured to make you linger and drink more coffee.

Maybe because coffee can cost…4 to 5 bucks.

I admit, I felt like an alien that was dropped on to another planet…Planet DarkRoast. I tried to fit in – but I think they could tell….I am a fraud. I am not one of them. I’m a Dunkin Donuts regular.

I’m not thinking of crossing over again too soon. I guess I’m just your average Joe who likes a cup of Joe…without all the fuss.