I was driving down the road today on my way to the Taj MaMall, (yes, again…Okay, I still have crap to buy) listening to a little holiday music and getting in the spirit. Fa la la la laa….that kind of stuff. When all of a sudden, my car is blasted with ice chunks and snow. It seems the knucklehead in front of me, in a big ass Denali, didn’t properly clean off his car. As he whizzes down the road, all his crap is landing onto my windshield. Yikes…first I jump, ‘cause the ice hits hard and loud and then I react by jerking the steering wheel to avoid more chunks. So I speed up to get beside the Numbskull and I mouth to the driver…Read My Lips….Clean off your car! Blank stare comes back….duh…you gotta a problem lady? Then OMG, the exact same thing happens again, but this time with a big ass Cadillac Escalade…different driver….same crap. What is going on?
Whew…sigh of relief. Those big asses better not mess with me. So I continue on my way to the Taj MaMall…I crank up the holiday tunes… “I’ll have a blue Christmas without you”….Wait, what is that? The car in front of me swerves to miss a 10 foot ladder in the lane…then, (being an expert driver, that I pretend to be) I swerve and miss the ladder too.
What is going on? I feel like I am actually in one of those bad video games where things pop up to get you before you reach the end….hmmmm….that’s it…obstacles are being thrown in my path to deter me from getting to the Taj MaMall…but it is gonna take more than a ladder and some ice chunks to keep me from my Taj MaMall…bring it on.
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