Erin Go Braugh

Erin Go Braugh

St. Paddy's Day

A day to celebrate Irish history, customs, and spirits.

A day to pay homage to St. Patrick

and St. Guiness.

Anywhoooo...

Remember to get your shamrock on.

Get out there and and celebrate the green...

Belt out "When Irish Eyes are Smiling."

Belt down a pint of green beer.

Loosen your belt for some corn beef and cabbage

Oh, one more...

this is directed to...

Erin go braugh(less)

 make sure you bring a sweater...

it could be chilly.

Happy St. Patrick's Day,

lads and lassies.

(This is just a wee bit late.)

Go Hawaii

Hawaii,

the 50th U.S. State,

with all it's natural beauty...

is a bouquet of

floral,

freshness,

and fragrance.

(I'm thinking about a career as an Hawaiian tourism advocate/blogger.)  

I easily understand why a person would decide to 

pack their bags,

and pack it in for the Hawaiian Islands.

And I would lead the pack...

if it wasn't for Hawaiian words and names. 

They put me into a (51st) state of confusion.

No matter how I try,

I can not begin to pronounce, read, repeat, or remember Hawaiian words.

I have a strong Hawaiian block...and it doesn't have an spf.

It probably has something to do with the numerous vowels.

If there was an "Hawaiian Wheel of Fortune"...it wouldn't take long to get through a game.

"Vanna I'd like to buy some vowels."

(Throw in a "k" or an "h" and game over.)

It is amazing how many more K's are found in

Hawaiian words

vs.

American/English words...

although the American word "kook" might quickly come to mind.

Anywhoooo......

To continue as an informative Hawaiian tourism blogger....

The official state flower is the Ma'ohauhele.

(ummm....Hibiscus)

and the state fish of Hawaii is humuhumunukunukuapia'a.

no.joke.

Try ordering the humuhumunukunukuapia'a in a restaurant.

A fish with 12 vowels better be tasty.

I usually stick with the two vowel fish that I can pronounce...

Ahi.

I was thinking I should add an extra "a" to my name...for a more authentic Hawaiian name....

ka'at.

but I just had a sinking feeling

my idea as an Hawaiian tourism blogger

is Ka'atOUT of the question. 

Aloha.

Life of a Rockstar

The winter months are a good time for me to join PaulA on a few business trips...

(Warm destinations need only apply.)  

They get me out of the bleak for weeks, so to speak.

Consequently this frequent traveler

has had infrequent blog postings. 

Colinboy keenly pointed out how I've been living the life of a rockstar.

"Hey Rockstar, where ya going now?" 

Ya know....he may be right.   (he may be crazy)

I just may  be a rockstar.

And I'm on a roll......

traveling the country,

trashing hotel rooms,

ordering room service,

sunning myself,

and shunning the public.

Anywhoooo.....

When you get down to the truth of the  grey matter... 

PaulA is the rockstar..not this Kat.

I'm actually living the life of his entourage...a professional clinger-on-er.

yahooie

Yep, this here Kat is PaulA's posse....giddy up. 

Puff Daddy/Puff/P. Diddy/Diddy has nothing on PaulA...

except maybe a few more nicknames.

Life  on the road  does provide the added benefit of providing

new experiences for new material....

which (as you know) would greatly benefit this blog.

Coming soon...

think leis,

luaus,

lava,

and leprosy.

Power to the Posse.

Bless Your Heart

The expression

“Bless your heart”

has many blessed meanings...

 i.e.

 You've having a Very Crappy Day....

your car has crapped out

and

your dog has crapped in the house.

A friend might say to you,

“Bless your heart...What a day you've had."

(Meaning...I know exactly how  you feel.)

“Bless your heart”

also has a way of turning insults into something less insulting...

especially when done by a professional blesser. 

 It takes the zing out of a full strength insult

and turns it into an...“InsultLITE.”

i.e.

You’re with some friends and there’s gossiping going down

 (you’re just listening, of course.)

“Did you see Jenny’s outfit today? Bless her heart.

She thinks those striped pants look good on her butt...plus

with all the weight gain since her baby...

Bless her heart.

There can also be times when YOU are on the receiving end of “Bless your heart.”

 Times when you’re "dissed" right to your face,

before you realize what just happened.

i.e.

“Oh, You got your hair cut. Bless your heart. 

You’re probably upset with how it came out. 

I’m sure you’ve tried everything to fix it, bless your heart.”

Anywhooo......

With so many blessings...

who needs to attend church on Sundays?

You are definitely headed straight to heaven. 

Even in that ugly ass sweater you’re wearing,

Bless your heart.

All Dogs go to Heaven

Hey Kat,

Look UP...

It's Duncandog HERE...

You wouldn't believe the joint I'm living in now.
.... some pretty sweet digs.


First off, I get to lounge around on big fluffy couches.

Best. sleep. ever.
And whenever I get the munchies...there's no waiting around.

It's Self-Service/Step Right Up/Help Yourself.

I go to the ATM and dispense myself some treats. 

Love the peanut butter ones.

I've got lots of pals up here and
catch this...

all my peeps in da hood 

love my rapping.
yo,yo.

 I always knew there was an audience somewhere for this

Rapper D.

 

And don't worry Kat,

I'm feeling

F.I.N.E.

My health has improved by leaps and bones...

which by the way, you will be happy to hear aren't stiff anymore.

I feel like that agile pup you brought home

14 years ago.

I swear there is something in the water here.
My Sweet Lord...
 I can actually see and hear again. 

Remember back in the day how I used to spy on you...

and follow you around...all FBI and all?

Well that's nothing...

Now I'm really watching you...

24/7

I'm actually in a Lazy Boy...right now...watching you on the tube...

switching channels between

the Animal Planet

and YOU

on closed circuit TV.   

And I see that you and the family are very sad I'm not with you :(
I want you to know...

you can stop crying now....

cuz this Duncandog is doing
A-Okay.

 Life at home with you, PaulA, Big C, Colinboy, and Wishy

was preettty grand,

 

but as you know, Kat...

All Dogs go to Heaven.

Kat in the Hat

Today is Dr. Suess's 108th birthday,

and also the strategic release of the movie:

"Dr.Suess' The Lorax."

To commemorate Dr. Suess.....
children of all ages are

making rhymes...

and committing crimes. 

(Hey, it rhymes.)

I have taken unjust liberties and created

a pseudoSuess

from my favorite Dr. Suess book,

Green Eggs and Ham.

(defintely a crime.lock her up)

Anywhooooo..........

 GREEN EGGS AND HAM

by KatOUT

I do NOT like Green Eggs and Ham.
I do NOT like them, Kat I am.

I do NOT like them on a bun.

I do NOT like them with a nun.

I do NOT like them for my dinner.

I do NOT like them with a sinner.

I do NOT like them on the floor.

I do NOT like them with a whore.

After a tasting....
I DO like Green Eggs and Ham.

YUMMY

I DO like them, Kat I am.

I DO like them in a car.

I DO like them in a bar.

I DO like them with my kin.

I DO like them with lotsa gin.

I DO like them with my mama.

I DO like them with Obama.

It’s hard to write like THE DOCTOR...

without looking like you need one.

Apparently....
This Kat is half in the hat.

Happy March 1st

As ol'  English superstition/tradition has it...

in order for you to pocket
a month of Good Luck,

you must say  "rabbit"

OUT LOUD ....
three times.

(I don't invent these rules...I just enforce them.)

And put away that lame rabbit's foot

you keep in your pocket. 

A rabbit's foot won't bring you luck....

unless you can authenticate that it is...

the left hind foot of
a rabbit that was shot or captured in a cemetery
during a full moon.

Otherwise,

you're better off pulling a rabbit out of your...

hat.

Anywhoooooo.......

In keeping with the upcoming St. Patrick's Day holiday...

3 O'Hares......

rabbit

rabbit

Rabbit

(kiss me)

 

Happy March 1st