Shark Week

What do ya do when you’re swimming in the ocean

and see a large dorsal fin

headed in your direction?

Kiss your bloody-self good-bye...

of course.

If you are thinking of swimming off the coast of Cape Cod...

you may want to think,

re-think,

and think again.

There have been numerous shark sightings around Cape Cod...

due to an increase in the gray seal population.

(the shark’s fav food group) 

A shark will zero in on a seal and attack it the same way that I attack

a pint of Ben and Jerry’s chocolate fudge brownie ice cream.  

(Leaving no prisoners.)

It seems, however, the sharks are getting tired of the

same ole, same ole...salty seal meal. 

They are now looking for something a little more sweet and spicy...

the human. 

Their taste buds crave a tasty zing only a human can bring.

Anywhoooo.....

This week is “Shark Week” on the Discovery Channel. 

The programming was developed to raise awareness and

r-e-s-p-e-c-t for sharks.

 Like many people, I developed respect for sharks in 1975

when the blockbuster movie “Jaws” came out. 

Even though I lived in Vermont, 250 miles from the ocean,

I was weary of dipping into any water...lake, pond, or bathtub. 

People everywhere were afraid to go in the water.

 The “Jaws” movie is probably the reason why that summer is known as the

“Smelly Summer of  '75.”

The “Jaws” movie today, however, wouldn’t scare a boo off

a boo-boo (huh?)  

because we are desensitized by today’s technologically advanced productions.

 But the two notes...from the "Jaws" theme...

da-dum    da-dum...

(synonymous with approaching danger)

always gets me looking over my shoulder.

So folks...when swimming...

Be on the lookout for sharks.

(smile for the camera)

Oh, and be careful of the

 Landshark.

Landsharks can be equally as dangerous.

Excessive Landsharks can land you on your butt....

and Landsharks posing as “Candygram”...

could just bite your head off.