You Must Be High

 I think about how much the world has changed 

over the nearly 95 years my Grandmother was alive- 

born in the the year 1915 when 

planes, trains and automobiles were taking off.

                                                                    Kat, baby Chelsea, Gramma, Mom

And here we are today 

with AI taking off 

making incredible 

advancements, 

developments,

 achievements, 

and 

enrichments…

 like 

online sports betting...

where you can go for broke 

without leaving home.

I remember back in high school 

being very impressed with 

our family stereo cabinet.  

Not only did it automatically play a stack of records…

it doubled as a beautiful piece of furniture 

to cherish and to polish.

I Pledged every Saturday…

to keep it looking good 

and now we FF to today 

 to digital music. 

Drop the needle-

it's a 

Mic Drop moment.

"You must be high."

In the 70's, I went off to college with a rad

 state of the art IBM Selectric typewriter.  

I loved this gem of technology 

with an erase cartridge I could pop in and out 

and fix a mistake with 5 steps.  

If you would have told me that

one day I could correct a mistake 

with a stroke of a delete key...

you would have knocked me over 

with a stroke of a feather.

Far Out, Man.

"You must be high."

And if you would have told me in college 

 marijuana would one day be legal…

sold out of a store front..

smelled on the street as you walk around;

I would have deliriously laughed out loud…

"You must be high."

I also remember in college using the pay phone 

hanging on the wall of my dorm. 

Sometimes I had to climb in, 

to get comfortable.

1 ringy dingy, 

2 ringy dingy

 I've gone from 

feeding coins to a pay telephone on the wall  

 to a cell phone in my pocket... 

that can 

navigate anywhere,

answer anything,

and

connect me to anyone.

Whatcha talkin' 'bout Willis?

"You must be high."

Anywhooo…

Everything now is…

online,

streamlined 

 with more advances 

coming down the pipeline 

in every field inclined

medical, banking, commerce, music, etc.

but, alas, I am most aligned..

with  

ON DEMAND streaming. 

As a kid I would have LOVED it if 

I could have watched the Sound of Music whenever I wanted,

 instead of once a year 

when it was aired. 

It was one of my Favorite Things.

How could that be real life? 

"You must be high."

The other day on my walk …

a driverless Waymo car whizzed by me.  

I’m not driven by the idea of being a passenger 

in a  car without a human head.  

Are you out of your mind? 

"You must be high." 

 I often wonder what life in the future 

will be like for our grandkids. 

What technology will 

Ansley, Presley, Daisy, 

Griffin and soon-to-be baby Highland 

see over the next 80 or 90 years?  

I suppose we are only held back 

by our imagination…

And if we can’t imagine it…

AI can.

Off to stream “Landman."

I think I’ll binge a few episodes…

just because I can. 

But first, 

some online sports betting. 

March Madness is coming in hot, y'all. 

"You must be high, Kat."

Jury Duty - Case Closed

 This past summer I received a summons for 

Jury Duty…

which I quickly pushed off to the Fall. 

Then as seasons go…Fall followed Summer.

cue the apples

(80's Kat)

  

Because there’s never a good time for jury service …

I decided to not put it off any longer and 

“just do it” 

(Nike style)

and hope they would do the run without me.

As summoned…

I showed up on “said date” and at “said place” 

and joined a room of 50 prospective jurors. 

As fresh juror meat, 

we were squeezed into elevators and were led to the criminal courtroom…

where we sat and waited…

to be peppered, 

grounded, 

processed 

and either rejected or selected. 

The juror meat packing process 

isn’t pretty, folks. 

12 people were called to the juror box…

where the DA and Defense lawyers explained 

the law, terms, and began peppering us...

with questions.

A few lucky meatheads were rejected and 

escaped the packing process.

Hmmm, why them? 

As the interviewing selection process inched on for hoooours…

I could feel the curtain of impending doom begin to fall over me……

I was next up 

for gettin' peppered.

I started thinking up crazy things I could say 

to have them take a pass on me. 

Unfortunately, I had just sworn to tell the truth.  

Turns out the truth did not set me free.

It landed me on the jury...

Juror number 12.

Anyhoooo…

PaulA said he knew they would choose me.  

Apparently, I walk around with 

“Pick Me” 

written on my forehead.  

So I duly and civilly performed my civil duty as Juror 12. 

For the record…

there was an upside to Jury duty.

The pay for Juror service was bumped up 

from $10/day to a 

whopping $20 PER DAY. 

And the DA actually said 

in a commanding tone 

“Your Honor, I object.”  

If only the Judge had slammed down

his fancy judge hammer and 

yelled 

“Order in the Court”... 

I would have been way happier about being there.

At least I’m free 

from the jury meat packing selection process 

for another 2 years.  

Maybe next time I’m called for jury duty, 

I’ll show up with 

“Pick Me” 

inked on my forehead. 

Maybe then, 

they would pass on this 

looney tunes blogger.

Case Closed.