Profile

We’ve been travelling a lot during the past month…as you may have noticed by my spotty entries…and not so spot-on blogs.

I don’t like to say exactly when we’re away, because that would be giving a green light to the crooks to “Come on Down. The Price is Right.” Besides, I like our spiffy Hi-def fancy pants TV, so I like to keep that information on the down low.

I’m not a fan of flying, but I’m also not a fan of the alternative…not flying. So I just do it. Anyway, during our latest travel, I’ve started to feel like the airlines are picking on me…profiling me…as the next Kat Bomber. What is it about my profile?

On one trip they pulled me out of line and asked to inspect my hands. I promised them I had washed after using the restroom. But they still insisted. So I put them out, palms facing up, as they requested. They dusted them with a brush containing a powder and did some test. I suppose they were looking for bomb residue. I proved to be innocent…although apparently my profile is questionable.

The last trip we took…security became very interested in my clogs. After my shoes had already been through the x-ray machine, they asked for them for further inspection. They probably took them aside because the clog had a wedge (not to be confused with chicken and a wedge) and thought they contained explosives. I gotta get a better looking profile.

As for PaulA’s profile…PaulA had his usually identity crisis. When he checked his bag, the attendant with the bag ticket called out “Paula.” (In case you care to know…that’s how Paul got his blog nickname. The airlines print his middle initial next to his name – PaulA…and it just cracks me up.) The airline attendant told PaulA he was in good company. The day before, they had a RobertA check his bag.

So if you are a crook out there…thinking about casing our joint…PaulA and the Kat Bomber may, or may not have left the house, but we aren’t telling you when, or where, or anything about the spanking, cool TV in our family room.