Bless Your Heart

The expression

“Bless your heart”

has many blessed meanings...

 i.e.

 You've having a Very Crappy Day....

your car has crapped out

and

your dog has crapped in the house.

A friend might say to you,

“Bless your heart...What a day you've had."

(Meaning...I know exactly how  you feel.)

“Bless your heart”

also has a way of turning insults into something less insulting...

especially when done by a professional blesser. 

 It takes the zing out of a full strength insult

and turns it into an...“InsultLITE.”

i.e.

You’re with some friends and there’s gossiping going down

 (you’re just listening, of course.)

“Did you see Jenny’s outfit today? Bless her heart.

She thinks those striped pants look good on her butt...plus

with all the weight gain since her baby...

Bless her heart.

There can also be times when YOU are on the receiving end of “Bless your heart.”

 Times when you’re "dissed" right to your face,

before you realize what just happened.

i.e.

“Oh, You got your hair cut. Bless your heart. 

You’re probably upset with how it came out. 

I’m sure you’ve tried everything to fix it, bless your heart.”

Anywhooo......

With so many blessings...

who needs to attend church on Sundays?

You are definitely headed straight to heaven. 

Even in that ugly ass sweater you’re wearing,

Bless your heart.