Happy Colintine's Day

To most people, today is Valentine’s Day….but to our family, it is Colintine’s Day. A Colin Birthday and Valentine’s Day all rolled into one sugary sweet day. So as I send out love and kisses to all my favorite Valentines…I also send out love and birthday wishes to Colinboy for a “Happy Birthday.”

23 years AGO in St. Louis…PaulA and I heard sweet music when the doctor said to us, “Congratulations…you have a son.” And 23 years later…Colinboy is making sweet music with his band, Dear Havanah. Oh, to be turning 23…finished with college and following your dream…filled with optimism, enthusiasm, and energy (where can I get me some of that.)

I know, I know…at age 23 I shouldn’t be calling him Colinboy especially with his new Jesus flo and beard look. (When did Jesus come back as a rocker?) I promise in another 23 years, I’ll drop the Colinboy nickname…and just go with Boy.

Anywhooooooooo………………

I love Valentine’s Day and all the sweet things that are wrapped up in it…hearts, flowers, cards, and candy…especially the conversational hearts. You know…the little NECCO candy hearts with short and sweet sayings. I like reading the little sayings on each candy heart as I pop them into my mouth. The only problem after 20 or 30 of them…you become very ill.

The conversation hearts have been around forever with cutsie sayings like:

Call Me
I’m Sure
Be Mine
Kiss Me
Hug Me
Whiz Kid (never got that one)

Then after a hundred years, NECCO added new sayings in the 90's to stay with the times:

Fax Me
Email Me

In 2000 they added:
Got Love
2000 Hugs
2000 Kisses.

I think the little hearts are due for some new sayings;

FB Me
Text Me
Tweet

Some Colin sayings would certainly jazz things up:

Waz up
Corp Flo
Mwaha
Woot
Idk
yahoo
DH rulz

And should NECCO give me a chance…I would add:

…
Read
Kats
Blog

P.S.

Have a Happy Birthday Colin(boy). Enjoy the tour…and always keep making saweet music. We are your biggest fans.

Under Reconstruction

Unbeknownst to me...a little mole infiltrated my blog shop and managed to create major underground damage.

The mole is a cute and seemingly innocent little mole, but her persistent works brought down the foundation of my blog. Before I knew it...the floors buckled, the walls fell, and the ceiling caved. I then was forced to reconstruct a new shop.

A renovation was probably long overdue and in the end...I will have the little mole to thank. But until then...when I get my hands on that mole........



Anywhooooo...........


This will be the new model for my blog shop...until the little mole rears her head again and decides I am in need of another remodeling.

National Botch/Blunder/Blooper

By now you had to have heard. Heard what happened to the Mickey Mouse Clubteer…turned mega recording artist...turned movie actress…turned blonde…..Christina Aguilera (aka Xtina) at this year’s Super Bowl.

Even if you weren’t into the Super Bowl because your favorite team didn’t make it. Even if you were watching a MOVIE (ahem, Wishy) instead of the SUPER of Bowls…you had to have heard that Xtina messed up the words to the National Anthem.

And it appears the blunder is something that Xtina can’t live down. It has taken on a life of its own...and is currently walking down Rodeo Drive. Her flub has become fodder for late night comedians…the talk of talk shows…and banter for bloggers.

The Super Bowl is a LIVE event and anything can happen during a live event. Your clothes could suddenly fall off exposing yourself to 100s of millions of people. Oh Say We Can See. YOWSER.

Anywhooo……………..

As a fellow national anthem singer (okay small potatoes) I would never jump on the Xtina bashing bandwagon. I know what it is like to stand in front of thousands of people …and I’m not a professional. (Although I do play one on TV.)

It just goes to show you how difficult the song is to sing. So in effect, Xtina’s blooper brings more credit to the fact that I haven’t (yet) screwed up the words over the past 10 years. (Never say “never.” It’s the sure kiss of doom.)

Fergie commented that Xtina’s mess up was probably due to nerves….I doubt it. Xtina has been singing in front of people since she was Christina. It has to do with the nature of the song. The words to the national anthem just don’t roll off your tongue like poetic words to songs like: “I wanna be a millionaire, so freakin’ bad.”

The national anthem is about ‘ramparts’ and ‘rockets’ and ‘gleaming’ and ‘streaming’…one missed word will send the anthem singer careening in another direction. Francis Scott Key could have made it easier on us all and chosen simple words that are easier to remember…like…"boom boom pow…gotta get-get.” Apparently, the Black Eyed Peas hit the scene a couple of centuries too late.

Unfortunately there are no do-overs with the national anthem. That is what is so scary about it. There are no second and third chances like Bill Clinton has had over the years. Clinton is King of Do-Overs…but has nothing on Trump…the King of comb-overs.

If I could give Katvice to Xtina, I would tell her… “Practice does make perfect.” But not the standard practice. I have found the best way to practice the national anthem is to sing the words while thinking of something entirely different…so the words come to you automatically. For example, think about: what you’re doing this weekend or your next meal. I know if I can sing the entire song without...slipping in my lunch order…I’m good to go.

I would be happy to help Xtina before the next time she performs the national anthem. Does anyone have her number?

"O’er the land of the Frito and the home of the Buffalo Wings."

The Social Network

We watched the move “The Social Network” last Friday night. It was PaulA’s first time. My third. I could easily watch that movie a fourth time…and I never ever repeat movies….although I do repeat myself. I have been known to repeat myself.

How did the movie make you feel about Mark Zuckerberg, the creator of Facebook? The movie shows him possessing many positive qualities…extraordinary intelligence, ambition. But he isn’t shown in a positive light. Arrogant, insecure, socially handicapped. I wonder what Zuckerberg thinks of the movie? Maybe a billionaire 12 times over doesn’t give a lick…he gets the last laugh.

There were many aspects of the movie that I liked…the acting, the familiar scenes of Cambridge, insight into the creation of Facebook. But I absolutely HATED…the portrayal of young women. Except for the young lawyer and Zuckerberg’s ex-BU girlfriend…every other young woman in the movie was either a clinger, a drunk, a sex addict, a drug addict, a whiner, a moron….or the ultimate combination…a psychotic whiny drunk sex-addicted bimbo. WTH? What the Heck?

The young men in the movie, on the other hand, were shown as intelligent, sharp, athletic, and goal oriented. WTF? What the Farce?

Anywhooooooo………………….

I discovered that PaulA and I had actually watched the movie on Facebook’s 7th birthday…which was February 4th. So I got to thinking about the world 7 years ago. OMG…It was a different world. Where would we be without Facebook? We have Mark Zukerberg to thank for our social network.

Without Mark and his Facebook…we would actually have to face our friends. We couldn’t have hundreds of friends that we kinda know. It would be hard to poke each other without getting slapped. When we wanted it known that we are ‘single’ or ‘in a relationship’ …we would have to wear a billboard around our necks….or a ring around our fingers. And we couldn’t blurt out: What’s on our mind."

Facebook has made a huge impact on entertainment, commerce, advertising, and politics. Obama and Sarah Palin might look like they don’t have much in common…but they both have used/abused Facebook. The Eyptian protesters even used Facebook to organize rallies. WTD? What the dealio?

7 years ago before Facebook…I had a few friends. Now thanks to Mark Zuckerberg…I have 27.

Thank you, Mark Zuckerberg.”

Ps. My favorite line from "The Social Network" is when Zuckerberg calls the Winklevoss twins… “Winklevii.” Cracks me up.

Super Bowl XLV- A First

Give me a B
Give me an O
Give me an O
Give me a Hoo
What does that spell?
Boo Hoo!

Did I hear cries during Super Bowl XLV...or was that you crying over a spilled nacho plate?

Super Bowl XLV made history. It was the first Super Bowl in 45 years without cheerleaders on the sidelines. The Steelers and Packers are among 6 NFL teams that don’t have professional cheerleading squads to cheer their teams on to V-I -C-T-O-R-Y.

The Dallas Cowgirl cheerleaders did poney up and offer their services (ooh yea)..but their offer was turned down because they didn't have an affiliation with either the Packers or Steelers. If they wanted to perform, they were told: "Kick it outside, Cowgirls." (Probably the first time any one of them was ever kicked to the curb.)

Anywhooooooooo............

Did you feel cheated out of the full football experience at this year's Super Bowl? Without the cheerleaders doing their thang...what would a fan watch between plays? There were no pom poms, no cheers. no claps. No grinding, no shaking...no booty, no booby.

And what was the cameraman to ‘shoot’ right before going to commercial?...A little boy and his Dad smiling? The cameraman would have gotten more entertaining shots of grown men drooling...if the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders were allowed to perform.

Some say that scantily clad, gyrating cheerleaders distract the fans from the game. One player was quoted as saying that they don’t need “eye candy” at their games. But I hear they do need a good gyro. Yum. Yum.

There are others who say cheerleading is a part of the game and it adds to the atmosphere. They say showing half naked women is not degrading...in the least. And least is best. Cheerleaders are an American tradition. Apple pie. Fourth of July. Hot Cheerleaders. Who are we to mess with a slice of Americana pie?

At least the Dallas cheerleaders were allowed to cheer outside the stadium: “That’s alright. That’s okay. We’re shaking booty, anyway.” I wonder how many were late getting to their seats...because they were watching the shake and bake outside.

Go. Fight. Shake. Shake. Shake.

Wish You Were Here

Do you remember going on a vacation before cell phones, iPads, and delicious blackberries? When you wanted to send greetings from your vacation spot to your family and friends back home…you dropped a postcard in the mailbox. “Scribble and drop” came waaay before “click and send.”

The postcard aka The Boastcard: a 3 ½ x 4 ½ note card subtly boasting: I’M ON VACATION AND YOU’RE AT HOME.

I remember sending postcards back in the day. It was important for me to promptly get the postcard into the mail so it arrived at home…before I did. I remember looking for just the right card…staring at them all on a revolving display rack…spinning it around and around…trying to decide which card subtly said: Nah, nah, nah…You’re stuck at home in 4 feet of snow and I’m in sunny Mexico. (For example, of course.)

The act of sending postcards is a lost art. The process of carefully selecting the right picture and crafting a message to that certain someone is becoming obsolete. Now we simply take a picture with our cell phone and forward it to 10 of our dearest friends…at the same time. Subject: “Wish you were here.”

You always had to be very careful about getting too personal with what you wrote on the back of the postcard. You didn’t want to divulge TMI…after all…the postcard would be read by everyone who touched it. Including the mailman. The mailman always knew everyone’s business.

Anywhooooooooo………………

I was thinking the inventors of Twitter probably got their “What I’m doing…in 140 characters or less” idea from a postcard. Tweet: "Yo. Yo. Wit da posse in Cabo San Juan for Sun, Sand, Salsa, and Siesta." 140 characters is approximately the amount of space you had to cram in your bad handwriting on the back of the card.

Seeing I didn’t get my act together and send out any boastcards…………here’s my postcardBLOG to YOU:

In Cabo…having a whale of a time. Watching the whales breach. One more margarita and tamale…and San Juan will have another beached whale sighting.
Wish You were here.

Mexican Immersion

I totally recommend traveling and experiencing other countries...not just immersing yourself in a resort pool at 86 degrees...but actually immersing yourself in a pool of culture... at 98.6. So while in Cabo...PaulA and I decided we would tear ourselves away from the swim-up bar and do just that.

First of all we would have to change our names so we would fit in. The names "PaulA" and "Kat" SCREAM AMERICANS ON VACATION...so we decided to go with Paulo and Gato. That way we would blend in with Maria, Alberto, Senor Frog, and Frito Bandito. We were determined to be igncognito and not stick out like a couple of gringos. We also decided losing our black socks and fanny packs would help.

Seeing it was Sunday and too early to be drinking margaritas...we decided to go to church...a spanish mass. Not to be confused with a spanish moss. A spanish moss is much longer than a spanish mass...which is generally an hour...like in the U.S.

The best thing about attending a catholic mass is that it is always the same, no matter where you are. You could be in South L.A. or South America...same/same. So even if you can't follow the language...you can follow the mass. Plus you always know that the basket being passed around means..."Fork it over, Amigo." Dinero...mula. Money talks in every language.

I found that the few years I took of high school spanish actually paid off. I just needed the priest to talk slower...so I could comprehend faster. I knew "Dios" was God, "Jesus" was Jesus, and "Amen" was Amen. There was a bilingual mass we could have gone to, but we were not interested in a mass for gringos. We were Paulo and Gato...a couple of Mexicans. GuacamOLE.

Anywhoooo....

One thing that takes some getting used to is seeing skeletons. I know a few of us have them rattling around the closet....but these skeletons are out in the open. They are seen everywhere...art, sculpture, figurines, paintings.

In the Mexican culture skeletons are not considered to be spooky and scary. They stem from their catholic heritage. Death is seen as another stage following life and is celebrated. I think I prefer to celebrate life with a birthday and balloons instead of a Day of the Dead and bones. (Note to self: A total Mexican immersion might be harder than I thought. Where's the hotel pool?)

Skeleton figurines of all sizes and materials (clay, plaster, paper machete) fill the shops.. They're dressed in different costumes from everyday situations and occupations. I've seen a bride, mariachi player, Michael Jackson, cupcake chef...and my favorite...the pole dancer. I was looking for an insurance man skeleton to give to Paulo. I admit...I was feeling left out...I couldn't find a blogger skeleton. Maybe Mexicans don't want to waste their time blogging when they have a siesta to get to . Adios Amigos.

gatoOUT
ps. conejo, conejo, conejo....and for you gringos...
rabbit, rabbit, rabbit